What It Says

“The Redeemer will come to Jerusalem to buy back those in Israel who have turned from their sins,” says the Lord.  (Isaiah 59-20)

 I found this verse very interesting.  It doesn’t say someone is going to come and heal everyone of His children.  The verse doesn’t say that God is going to swoop in and be the Daddy Worbucks of the world and grant every material wish it may have.  And Isaiah isn’t saying that the Redeemer is going to tap dance His way into our hearts with sales slogans or begging.  “The Redeemer will come….to buy back….those…who have turned from their sins.”

 Jesus came to earth as man for one reason and one reason alone:  to be the perfect Lamb.  He showed us the way and then paved the road for us with His own blood.  Now, when you confess your heart to God and accept Jesus as your Redeemer you are promised an eternity with Him.  All the blessings that fall on you, all the trials that make you stronger, the people who come into your life to make it richer, and looking in a child’s eyes—your child’s eyes—is all icing on an already perfect cake.  The Savior came for you, to buy you and bring you to the Lord, and your eternity has already begun.

 “And the people will come from all over the world—from east and west, north and south—to take their places in the Kingdom of God.  And note this:  Some who seem least important now will be the greatest then, and some who are the greatest now will be the least important then.” (Luke 13:29-30)

Silence is Golden

“A time to hear and a time to mend.  A time to be quiet and a time to speak.”  (Ecclesiastes 3:7)

 For a time I thought I have been experiencing a complete and total burnout.  I thought I was tired from long hours of homework, car pools, house cleaning (or lack there of), driving back and forth to wherever the kids need to be, and training at work which involved many long hours of staring at documents and spreadsheets and trying to remember what each one says. School is over, car pool is over, the kids are home more to help around the house, but now I have joined the planning team for VBS at church and that is keeping me very busy.  I have missed writing every morning but I haven’t been getting up in time to do it. I have felt lonely and like something was missing.

 This week I realized that nothing was missing.  Two things occurred to me at the same time.  First, I promised myself I wouldn’t write just to write and, honestly, I haven’t felt like saying anything lately. Second, nothing at all has been missing.  My plate is most definitely full and it’s full of really great stuff.  My daughter is in an amazing musical that has been eating up my weekends but I love being down at the theater and to be able to share this with her has been a blessing for me.  I love my job and the opportunities that have presented themselves to me.  I feel slightly overwhelmed but I know I am where I need to be and it’s going to be all good.  Finally, I am excited to be a part of VBS this year.  It’s crazy, stressful, and a blessing.  I am anxious to see the kids and the leaders walk through those doors Sunday night.  So, nothing has been missing.  God just helped me lighten my load a bit so that I could find balance.

 My relationship with Jesus may have changed a bit in the last couple of months.  I guess if I were to try to explain it I would say that up until May I was sitting down and having coffee with Him as we talked about life (thank you Sally).  Now, I feel like we aren’t talking to each other as much as we are building something great together.  He has never left my side and its okay that someone isn’t always talking in any relationship.  Silence is golden, or maybe silence is me going nuts from mixing too many things together.  So, if things seem crazy or you feel kind of off take a step back and try to see the bigger picture.  I am sure that you are in the midst of an opportunity and you will enjoy it more if you see it now than if you have to constantly look back on it later.

 “Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it give us assurance about the things we cannot see.” (Hebrews 11:1)

A Big Plan

“But not a single sparrow can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it.  And the very hairs on your head are all numbered.  So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows.”  (Matthew 10: 29b-31)

 I have been able to do a lot of reading lately.  The kids and I have been taking trips to the library and I am bringing home 6-8 books a week.  Saturday I read a book that I really felt reached in and touched my soul.  Have you ever had that happen?  I mean I read books I love, read books I can’t get enough of, and read books that I can relate to but this could book could have been about me and could have described my life before Jesus…and after (kinda). 

There is something about walking around feeling worthless and dirty.  There is something about wanting a prince charming to come and rescue you but after reading dirty romance novels you have an unrealistic idea of love and passion.  It wasn’t until Jesus met me where I was that I knew I was worth something.  And it wasn’t until Jesus cleaned away the dirt that I mucked up in my life that I knew what real love was.  It was then that I could truly love my husband and my children.  It was then that I slowly begun to learn about grace, forgiveness, and understanding.

God has a big plan for everyone.  Even in this economic and political turmoil God is here. He is there is your smallest and your biggest celebrations and struggles.  Jesus is there on the left and right.  God is sitting with you in the pew on Sunday morning and at your desk when you go to work Monday morning.  God is with you when you have to have those tough discussions with your kids and He is there when your kids make the right or the wrong decision without you looking over their shoulder.  God’s plan is perfect.  No matter what we decide to do His plan will work.  If anyone could screw up a good plan it’s me (ask the hubby) but God didn’t let me stay in that dark place.  He brought me out and now I can live in the light! 

“For I know the plans” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”  (Jeremiah 29:11)

Something Good

“This is what the Lord says:  ‘Stop at the crossroads and look around.  Ask for the old, godly way, and walk in it.  Travel its path, and you will find rest for your souls.’” (Jeremiah 6:16a) 

Sleep is a beautiful thing.  I can say that very proudly as I got my first good night of sleep in over two weeks.  This beautiful spring air is doing a number to my sinuses.  My allergies are in full force.  I have trouble breathing.  I am constantly blowing my nose.  My eyes feel like they have scratches on them.  I am starting to hear a gurgling in my ears and all these things combined leave me up most of the night because it’s hard to sleep when you can’t breathe and you are always blowing your nose!  It took all weekend but the insurance company approved the meds the doctor prescribed last week and I slept all night. 

 My relief comes in small doses.  If I want to sleep all night I have to take this pill at night which means I may be blowing my nose quite a bit today, at least until I supplement with something over the counter, but there is relief.  I will probably continue to be trapped in the house for a couple more weeks and then POOF my allergies will disappear, the drainage will go away, and I will be as normal and I can get.  In all the trials I have gone through, and that lay before me, this is probably small in comparison but it is a hard time for me all the same.  

Life is a constant stream of experiences, some of them joyful and some painful.  If we let Him, God can use anything to bring us closer to Him and to make us stronger.  I am surrounded by the joys of new life, friends making new homes, new beginnings, and even new careers.  I am equally surrounded by risky surgeries, the return of cancer, and people I love having to face the pain of losing their jobs, homes, and security.  Over and over again this week I have heard that God will use our trials to make us stronger.  I swear versus that cover this are everywhere I turn and I appreciate it so much.  As I spent about a month in a shadow of time and I see myself coming out of that, stuffy nose and all, I am thankful that I know that God will bring me through anything no matter how insignificant it may be or how heavy the burden feels. 

 “In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus.  So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation.  All power to him forever! Amen.” (1 Peter 5:10-11)

Play Ball

“I called out to you so often, but you wouldn’t come.  I reached out to you, but you paid no attention.  You ignored my advice and rejected the correction I offered.” (Proverbs 1:24-25)

 The first few innings of last night’s softball game didn’t start out so great.  This was our first game in two weeks and our third time playing together.  Our team is made up of people who really don’t know each other.  We were grateful the first game because we came together quite nicely, last night we were off.  I really shouldn’t judge.  I play as little as possible (I am subbing and only as I favor, I didn’t want to play this year), so I feel bad when I cringe at the errors made on the field but something had to give.  

During the top of the fifth inning I looked at the other player in the dugout and suggested that we move some people around.  He agreed and we quickly decided who would move where.  Luckily, everyone on our team is pretty easy going and they each are willing to play where ever they are needed.  A couple of swaps of positions and we saw an immediate difference.  Before they were able to get almost ten runs, after the change they only got a couple more.  We did lose the game but we lost pleased with ourselves for knowing when to make changes and listening to the team in an encouraging way to perform as best as we could. 

 There are so many times when it feels like I am doing the same thing over and over again.  Everything becomes routine, regardless if it working or not.  There are other times when new ideas are presented that I just want to shut them down because there is no way that they would ever work.  I cannot count the number of times I should have changed or the limitless number of times an idea I thought was crazy turned out to be extremely successful.  I need to remember that I am not walking alone and I need to listen to God and be more open-minded to the people in my life.  I want to be humble and moldable.  Sometimes I feel hard and flaky.  Listen.  Listen for God and listen to the things going around you.  You may be surprised at what is waiting for you on the other side and you may just experience a better inning in life than you were expecting.

 “You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.” (James 1:19a)

Off Schedule

“For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1)

 

I believe my need for schedules really became apparent during the five-plus years I did daycare.  I averaged 4-5 children at a time all under the age of 4 and then some before and after-school kids as well.  About half-way into this new vocation I started taking classes online, working toward the accounting dream I never wanted to admit I had.  Schedules are huge in my life, which means I have excellent time management skills (toot-toot).  However, there is a definite limit to my superhero abilities. I can’t have too much on my plate, even though I try, and if anything throws me off of schedule I am worthless and cannot function to full capacity.

 

This leads to my recent silence.  The classes I am taking right now are overwhelming hard and extremely time consuming.  Last week I had two big tests to take and simply thinking about how hard the tests were going to be stressed me.  On top of that our daughter got a part in the next children’s musical and the parent’s meeting and rehearsals started last week.  And, to make my life ever-more so complicated I discovered that in a fight between a partially opened can and my hand I will always loose, so my right hand was slightly out of commission as well.  I balance my life precariously on a very fined tuned schedule and last week I was off of schedule and, as previously noted, when that happens I tend to not be able to do anything. I got the basics down: kids fed and dressed and I went to work everyday if anything got done above that it was an act of God and I was very thankful to have Him in my life.

 

I know God has a schedule.  I don’t understand it and I don’t think I have followed it very well in the past.  Jeremiah 29:11 says that God has good plans for our future.  I wonder, if when we take our destiny into our own hands, if we throw that schedule off.   I have been thinking that maybe God has point A and point B picked out, knowing we’ll get to point B eventually, but how we get there is up to us?  I know with every bone in my body that God made me an accountant and I love it.  I didn’t get to college right after high school.  In fact, I just kept making babies!  But even though I may have thrown my schedule off I am still arriving at point B.  Even though last week was a sticky walk in the mud for me I still made it through and everyone around me survived as well.  So, when you feel like you have continually messed up the big picture remember God will always show you a way to point B.  We just need to put things in perspective, which means putting our trust in God, and holding onto the hope and promise that God knows what He is doing even when we don’t.

 

“So be careful how you live.  Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise.  Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do.” (Ephesians 5:15-17)

God Moments

 

“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” (Jeremiah 29:11)

 

Have I told you about the church’s Parable Project? Just in case I haven’t Oakwood is the midst of a crazy mission where someone gave the church $5000 to be handed out to 50 people. Everyone who stepped up got $100 and it was up to them to grow that money. We have people making lotions, raising money for a young lady in the hospital, making dolls for kids who are sick, teaming up with Habitat for Humanity, doing can drives in schools, starting new college scholarships, and so much more. This has been an extremely exciting time in our family of faith. Gabrielle and I went up for this mystery assignment. I had no idea what we were going to do until I saw a homeless guy on a bike by my work and I knew: bikes. Our small part of this huge Parable Project was going to have something to do with bikes.

 

Greg and I, mostly Greg, have begun the process of reconditioning and fixing up three bikes. I had no idea who to give these bikes too but I know there are a lot of people who are trying to get back to work, have no transportation, or just need a break but where do I start? We take the bikes to Rasmussen’s in Altoona when we need more extreme care done. We went there a couple weeks ago to pick up a tire and a bike that had been worked on. Part of this bike idea is that I would really love to host a Parable Bike Ride/Walk. I have never tried to set up a huge ride before so I asked the clerk how to do it. We kind of explained what we were trying to do. The guy working the counter happens to work for the Iowa Workforce Development and knew of at least one person who could really use a bike and thought that several others would probably be candidates as well. I am very excited!

 

God is so good. He came down and met me exactly where I was. I knew that bikes were our focus but I didn’t know how to get from point A to point B and who to give them too. Now, we are going to try to work with Iowa Workforce Development and figure out what the process of giving them the bikes would be so they could give them to the people who need them. I am still floundering about the bike ride but we’ll get there. I was reminded, in the most simple way, that I do not need to come up with all the answers and not every solution can be found in Google®. God will guide me and show me the way!

 

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” (Roman 8:28)

Hiding

“Well then, you might say, ‘Why does God blame people for not responding? Haven’t they simply done what he makes them do?’” (Romans 9:19)

 

I love writing. My passion may have been hard to see lately, since my schedule has begun to overwhelm me again, but I do love writing. And I am not sure if it is the writing so much as that I feel obligated to do it. Because of this obligation I feel God is sometimes holding a magnifying glass to my life, somewhat like what salaried church staff may experience without my name being in the bulletin (oh yeah, and without the salary). I appreciate this magnifying glass immensely because not only is God using the jumbled up morning ramblings of a random woman to reach out to people but He has chipped away at the fortress I built around myself and there is very rarely anything in my life that everyone cannot see. You all walk this path with me and I may hesitate but I always end up sharing my struggles and my triumphs, regardless if you want to hear it or not. God is who I am accountable for in all things. Because I am in Him there is no hiding.

 

Sometimes I wish I had God’s knack for knowing everything that goes on in the heart of His children. Although, I will admit that the idea scares me. I believe God knows every miscellaneous thought that has crossed my brain and/or heart, which makes me want to hurl. There are days when I wish I could be with my kids throughout every moment like God is with me. Maybe then I wouldn’t be so scared of what they may encounter. There are other days when I am thankful for their trials because they will hopefully learn and grow from them as I have from mine. Whereas I cannot hide from God, my children (and anyone else for that matter) can hide from me. I pray for the day when my children love God the way that I do and know that there is no reality in hiding from the Creator of the universe.

 

I am thankful that our God is not holding strings and dictating our every move because then I don’t think life would be worth living. I am equally thankful that I feel extremely accountable to God and that He has placed people in my life to pick me up when I fall. Two days ago, if you were to ask me what my biggest fear would be I would have told you that I didn’t have one. Now, I realize that my biggest fear is what my children may choose to hide from me as they grow. I can tell you, I think with all honesty, that I, unlike God, do NOT want to know everything. I will be frank and say that there are somethings I would rather just pretend won’t happen. But I don’t want to be the parent with rose colored glasses who misses everything. I simply pray that as my children live their lives that they look to God, and the people He has placed in their lives, to help pick them up when they fall. I pray they realize there really is no hiding, no matter how well they guard themselves.

 

if you remain faithful to my teachings. And you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:31-32)

 

Clarity

“So the trouble is not with the law, for it is spiritual and good. The trouble is with me, for I am all too human, a slave to sin. I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate.” (Romans 7:14-15)

 

I didn’t want to get out of bed this morning. I was having a good deep sleep when the alarm first went off. I should have gotten up then but I hit the snooze. The alarm went off again just as the girls called me to say they were on their way. For the first time in months we were walking. We haven’t gotten together for our morning walk for a while now. Getting up everyday at 5 am is an easy habit to break and a hard one to reacquire. My schedule allows me to work out (most days) in the afternoon if I wish, if I wish.

 

I can already tell a difference.  I haven’t lost 20 lbs in one morning but I do feel clear and refreshed. I got to spend the morning with two fabulous women. We talked; we laughed, and caught up. I got my “girl time” in. I got my body moving. I am not sure which one helps me stay more focused when I come home and talked to God and read my Bible, but I had no problem rolling the praises out this morning! I couldn’t stop thinking of things I was thankful for and how big God is. I love mornings like that, when I see a little more clearly than I had the previous night when I went to bed.

 

This has seemed like a long winter. Even with the storms rolling over us now I am hopeful for what the change in seasons brings. Being able to workout and spend time with my friends every morning really does help me gear up for whatever God is going to pass over me in the day ahead. I know not everyone is going to get re-charged the way I do but do you know what you need to get there? What refreshes you? What helps you stay clear? I think I had forgotten how badly I needed this or how beautifully God had made me to cherish these early mornings. I hope I don’t need to be reminded again.

 

“Shout with joy to the Lord, all the earth! Worship the lord with gladness. Come before him, singing with joy. Acknowledge that the Lord is God! He made us, and we are his. We are his people, the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving; go into his courts with praise. Give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good. His unfailing love continues forever, and his faithfulness continues to each generation.” (Psalm 100: 1-5)

Journeys

“I know, Lord, that our lives our not our own. We are not able to plan our own course. So, correct me, Lord, but please be gentle.” (Jeremiah 10:23-24)

 

I read that today and I almost started to giggle, even though I know it’s not funny. I couldn’t even begin to tell you how many times I have prayed that exact prayer! Even reading it over and over again I can see it in my mind. How many times have I sat in this exact spot and let God know that I know He is in control? How many times have I confessed my sins but then, in the back of my mind, I am chanting “be gentle, be gentle, be gentle”? Do you ever feel good when you know you are not alone in your heart?

 

My journey through the Bible this morning was much of the same. I came across verses, as I did my morning Lent readings, and each time I felt God speaking to me. This is why I love God’s Word because the pages aren’t just filled with words. This tattered book I carry around with me, and try to pick up every morning, has become His voice in my heart. Now, I don’t get these warm fuzzy feelings every time but when I do it’s pretty neat stuff and I reminded once again of God’s beauty and His grace and love. I am reminded of how blessed I am and how much I love Him!

 

So, I finish this up with a few more versus from today.

 

“As the deer longs for streams of water, so I long for you, O God. I thirst for God, the living God. When can I go and stand before him?” (Psalm 42:1-2)

 

“Send out your light and your truth; let them guide me. Let them lead me to your holy mountain, to the place where you live.” (Psalm 43:3)

 

“For the sin of this one man, Adam, causes death to rule over many. But even greater is God’s wonderful grace and his gift of righteousness, for all who receive it will live in triumph over sin and death through this one man, Jesus Christ,” (Romans 5:17)

 

Jesus said to the people who believed in him, “You are truly my disciples if you remain faithful to my teachings. And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:31-32)